The Collegian
Tuesday, November 26, 2024

Tune In: Spartacus ... sex, violence and flashy cinematography

"Spartacus" is a new, awesome take on pornography. I suppose it could be categorized as a historical time-period fetish series -- nothing gets me going like the Third Servile War!

There is some plot, a feature that some thought was forever lost in the golden age of the '70s, but there is not so much that it distracts from the sex scenes and general nudity.

"Spartacus" operates under several guidelines. Rule 1: The audience must never be bored. If there is any danger of this, cut to a topless scene. Rule 2: Every scene must appeal to our carnal or primal desires; if there is no nudity, there must be violence. The makers of "Spartacus" are terrified of any scene that doesn't include either nudity or violence, as they should be, because the show is based on constant stimulation. Rule 3: Do not use articles or pronouns unless absolutely necessary, especially when using profane words. Rule 4: Always use the profane words to specifically describe their interaction through metaphor.

I was initially attracted to the show because I like that time period and I find the ancient Greeks and Romans interesting -- in other words, I came for intellectual intrigue, but I stayed for boobs and amazing fight scenes. If you like "Spartacus," but are looking for a little more substance, I would recommend "Rome." Without sacrificing too much nudity and bloodshed, "Rome" is more plot-and character-driven.

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